New on 500px : INTO THE LIGHT by SunnyKabbinada by SunnyKabbinada

But today was different. Today Aarihini was so ready to speak with whomever she could that she immediately said hello to the woman, who warmly greeted her back. Aarihini was thrilled to make contact. She knew how painfully lonely she felt, but she didn’t know how ready she was to share her story and her feelings. So many things that she had all but forgotten came rushing out of her as she spoke to Alpa – it turned out that those things inside of her were just waiting for the right person to reveal themselves to.
Alpa had a similar feeling upon first speaking to Aarihini. She had felt like there was nothing left inside of her, but once she began talking and feeling the understanding of her new found friend, she realized that there were worlds of thoughts, ideas and feelings to share!
As the women talked, they discovered that both of them had lost their mothers and they both felt stuck in routines that kept them from living the lives they had wished for themselves when they were younger.

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New on 500px : INTO THE LIGHT by SunnyKabbinada by SunnyKabbinada

But today was different. Today Aarihini was so ready to speak with whomever she could that she immediately said hello to the woman, who warmly greeted her back. Aarihini was thrilled to make contact. She knew how painfully lonely she felt, but she didn’t know how ready she was to share her story and her feelings. So many things that she had all but forgotten came rushing out of her as she spoke to Alpa – it turned out that those things inside of her were just waiting for the right person to reveal themselves to.
Alpa had a similar feeling upon first speaking to Aarihini. She had felt like there was nothing left inside of her, but once she began talking and feeling the understanding of her new found friend, she realized that there were worlds of thoughts, ideas and feelings to share!
As the women talked, they discovered that both of them had lost their mothers and they both felt stuck in routines that kept them from living the lives they had wished for themselves when they were younger.

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New on 500px : INTO THE LIGHT by SunnyKabbinada by SunnyKabbinada

Aarihini forgot some of the words to the song she was singing and went quiet for a few minutes. Had she really forgotten? These memories of her mother were all that she had left now and she could not allow them to disappear!

But then she recalled the details of when her mother would sing the song in their kitchen: She saw her mother there – chopping vegetables in the late afternoon with chai brewing on the stovetop – and then she remembered the rest of the song. She began singing again.

Not long after that, Aarihini noticed a woman come down the village hillside toward her. The women stopped in the middle of the road and then just stood there staring at her, wearing an expression of surprise and guardedness.

On any other day, Aarinhini may have assumed that this village woman was judging her negatively or considered her some strange novelty. She would have ignored the women and gotten into her car to continue her journey.

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Alpa’s depressed self-blaming was interrupted when she suddenly thought she heard her mother’s voice coming from outside. She called out for her instantly: “Amma? Amma!”
She knew that it could not possibly be her Amma, the one person she knew cared about her happiness. Amma had died long back, when life was all drawn out: a straight line that consistently moved ahead with no questions, no worries – only a plan that needed to be followed.
Alpa wondered again how that straight line had so easily become a downward spiral and she had no answers for herself.
She continued to hear the voice, singing a song she remembered from childhood. It sounded so much like her mother that Alpa thought that maybe she was dreaming or had even unknowingly passed into her next life; what other explanation could there be?

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She thought of her past friends and playmates who used to join her here. Most of them had moved to other villages after marriage, and the few who were here seemed so happy with their lives. Alpa would meet them and every time, just as she was about to ask for advice, she would realize that they would not understand. They were connected, they were not down in the well – how could they have any idea of what Alpa was going through?
Alpa receded further into herself where all was helplessness and delusion. What hope could there possibly be?
She curled into herself, into a place so dark and so removed that she felt she may never be able to come back.

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Aairihini came back to the present moment and realized she had been driving aimlessly while her mind was wandering. She had no idea where she was!
She stopped the car and somehow felt she was missing her mother more than ever. Aarihini felt a deep sense of regret for the stubbornness and defiance she showed her mother for so many years.
She felt like there was so much of life that she wasn’t living and knew that if only her mother were alive, she would be able to advise her on what to do – and she would listen. Aarihini started to imagine what advice her mother would give if she were there now….
She got out of the car and scanned the village landscape as the imaginary conversation with her mother played out in her head. She wandered along the deserted main road, imagining, thinking, remembering.
She started singing a song her mother used to sing to her when she was a young child – it had been so many years! Aarihini was surprised that she even remembered that song.

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New on 500px : INTO THE LIGHT by SunnyKabbinada by SunnyKabbinada

Aairihini came back to the present moment and realized she had been driving aimlessly while her mind was wandering. She had no idea where she was!
She stopped the car and somehow felt she was missing her mother more than ever. Aarihini felt a deep sense of regret for the stubbornness and defiance she showed her mother for so many years.
She felt like there was so much of life that she wasn’t living and knew that if only her mother were alive, she would be able to advise her on what to do – and she would listen. Aarihini started to imagine what advice her mother would give if she were there now….
She got out of the car and scanned the village landscape as the imaginary conversation with her mother played out in her head. She wandered along the deserted main road, imagining, thinking, remembering.
She started singing a song her mother used to sing to her when she was a young child – it had been so many years! Aarihini was surprised that she even remembered that song.

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New on 500px : INTO THE LIGHT by SunnyKabbinada by SunnyKabbinada

When Aarihini got back into the car, she looked into her rearview mirror and began to put on her red lipstick out of habit. After a moment, she began to laugh at herself for putting on lipstick just to wander around some villages.
“Who out here would even see me to notice”?, she thought. Then she realized that hardly anyone was there to notice at home, either, where she lived and worked mostly alone and hardly ever went out.
Aarihini thought back to the days when she started wearing bright lipsticks as an act of rebellion – it drove her mother crazy, but she liked the way it made her feel extra confident and assertive. Nowadays, it was just a habit, like so much else in her life.
Aarihini thought about how she wears that bright lipstick now – Not to go out on the town like she used to, but rather to sit and work through all hours of the night, many times not meeting anyone at all.

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New on 500px : INTO THE LIGHT by SunnyKabbinada by SunnyKabbinada

When Aarihini got back into the car, she looked into her rearview mirror and began to put on her red lipstick out of habit. After a moment, she began to laugh at herself for putting on lipstick just to wander around some villages.
“Who out here would even see me to notice”?, she thought. Then she realized that hardly anyone was there to notice at home, either, where she lived and worked mostly alone and hardly ever went out.
Aarihini thought back to the days when she started wearing bright lipsticks as an act of rebellion – it drove her mother crazy, but she liked the way it made her feel extra confident and assertive. Nowadays, it was just a habit, like so much else in her life.
Aarihini thought about how she wears that bright lipstick now – Not to go out on the town like she used to, but rather to sit and work through all hours of the night, many times not meeting anyone at all.

via 500px http://bit.ly/2fQDDLo

New on 500px : INTO THE LIGHT by SunnyKabbinada by SunnyKabbinada

When Aarihini got back into the car, she looked into her rearview mirror and began to put on her red lipstick out of habit. After a moment, she began to laugh at herself for putting on lipstick just to wander around some villages.
“Who out here would even see me to notice”?, she thought. Then she realized that hardly anyone was there to notice at home, either, where she lived and worked mostly alone and hardly ever went out.
Aarihini thought back to the days when she started wearing bright lipsticks as an act of rebellion – it drove her mother crazy, but she liked the way it made her feel extra confident and assertive. Nowadays, it was just a habit, like so much else in her life.
Aarihini thought about how she wears that bright lipstick now – Not to go out on the town like she used to, but rather to sit and work through all hours of the night, many times not meeting anyone at all.

via 500px http://bit.ly/2fQDDLo

New on 500px : INTO THE LIGHT by SunnyKabbinada by SunnyKabbinada

When Aarihini got back into the car, she looked into her rearview mirror and began to put on her red lipstick out of habit. After a moment, she began to laugh at herself for putting on lipstick just to wander around some villages.
“Who out here would even see me to notice”?, she thought. Then she realized that hardly anyone was there to notice at home, either, where she lived and worked mostly alone and hardly ever went out.
Aarihini thought back to the days when she started wearing bright lipsticks as an act of rebellion – it drove her mother crazy, but she liked the way it made her feel extra confident and assertive. Nowadays, it was just a habit, like so much else in her life.
Aarihini thought about how she wears that bright lipstick now – Not to go out on the town like she used to, but rather to sit and work through all hours of the night, many times not meeting anyone at all.

via 500px http://bit.ly/2fQDDLo